I realized this morning, that I have changed. I'm not sure when it happened or how, but I think it's from observing other mothers who I truly admire, and who inspire me.
I thought to post this on my other blog, but think that being a mother really and truly changes you. Some aspects of your personality will always be there, but some of it you can change, if you want to change it anyways.
Anyway, this morning I was doing some reading, my son decided to sleep in. I got up at 7AM to shower, get some coffee, and look up a shepherds pie recipe for my husbands dinner. He's sadly laid up in bed for the next week due to a pretty invasive surgery on his feet. I'm doing my best to give him the love and rest he needs. He did bust his but to care for me for almost 9 months, I feel he deserves some payback.
So in my ventures online I decided to look up some information on Mary Kay. A good friend of mine is selling it and doing exceptionally well, and I love the products and thought at some point I might like to do a testimonial so I googled Mary Kay testimonials. I've also considered selling it, but we'll see, I haven't decided... Not the point.
What I wound up finding was a hole site devoted to the loathing of Mary Kay. One article in particular written by a woman who worked for the company for 9 years... Her letter was one of absolute hate, regret, and talked about her loss and her investments into the company. How she tried to change her strategy even to make it big in the company. What I took away from it, wasn't "oh how heartfelt" or "poor lady" or even "it's good to vent" Cause I am ALL about being honest with your feelings, venting, and the like. But here's a true story:
My father, at 70 lost his job with a company I will not name, but he worked his butt off for 13 years. About 3 months before they let him go, they gave him a huge raise, a bonus and even cut back his hours as a new company policy that employees weren't allowed to work too many hours. But would still make the same pay if not better... Then three months later, the company went downhill, and they fired him, on the grounds that his job performance had plummeted. None of this was true, as he'd just gotten a write up about how GREAT he'd been doing... They did it cause they couldn't afford to keep him on, and he was also one of the older employees, but to avoid a law suit, they did it the old fashioned way. Lying. To cover their butts, cause they needed to make financial cut backs, and hire a bunch of new young idiots to run their store, who they could pay peanuts for an intro level job. What did my dad do? Nothing, he didn't fight it, he simply applied for his unemployment, and never once did I hear him say a negative for cruel word about the company. He realized, like so many who don't, that his bitching, moaning and groaning, wouldn't help. It would not get him back his job, a job he didn't even like all that much. SO he moved on. Now my dad IS over 70, so I would say his age has mellowed him a bit, bit NO my dad has always been this way. A stand up, class act. He is the kind of person who know when to hold em, knows when to fold em, knows when to walk away and knows when to run. He is wise, and has always had composure. He is not a Gambler, like the one Kenny Rodgers sings about, but he knows how to keep a great poker face, and I have a feeling, he'd win any hand he was dealt if he ever played. No one would ever know a bad hand if he had one, cause he never shows that bad hand. It's something to be admired, and something I deeply respect about my father.
Sadly I've been the complete opposite most of my life. Wearing my heart on my sleeve like a child. Much like that woman dissing the Mary Kay name to make herself feel better, and licking her wounds, I have often vented online, hoping and praying for attention and affection. They call it "support" but I think in many ways, it's weakness. I never saw it that way till just now. And realize all the weakness I poured out over the years online, it is quite sad. I feel so much better sharing the good and wonderful things in my life, talking about my challenges in a positive way, sharing amazing recipes, and inspiring words for life. I still have my days, as women and mothers, and people (men alike) we all have those days where we want to scream and shout about our crap day, or crap life, and that's fine, but devoting a WHOLE site to something you are angry about, it's using energy and time you could have spent doing something great, something amazing, something uplifting, or something to change your life for the better.
My best advice, when or if you see someone doing that, realize they are miserable, miserable in their lives, and just give them as much love as you can, and send them some well wishes, cause that's all they really need. This woman who told her story about her failure with MK, had worked with them, sold their products for 9 years... I HAD to comment, and I basically said that I have been making art my whole life, and have still yet to see the financial benefits. But when you choose to start a company, work for a company, sell your own craft, etc... Don't blame the company, don't blame your craft or think it's crap, or blame anything else, because being an entrepreneur of any kind means you might take hits financially. You may make infinite investments to keep it going cause it's your baby, or it's just what you LOVE doing. But if you fail in a company, or get fired, don't blame the company, sometimes it's just life, and business is business. And understand the realities of business. Business will not watch your back for you, so you have to watch your own back. This women stuck with MK for 9 years... I think after even 1 or 2 she knew what she was getting into, how much she was investing how much she was making, but continued anyways... So that's all her... She was blaming a company for something she and she alone did for a long 9 years, despite her obvious frustrations.
I guess I felt for her on some level, cause I've been that angry person, needing to share and share and share that anger. But here's the truth, it gets you know where. And this is my Mother Dome advice for the day. It's cool to vent to a trusted friend, it's cool to share with heck ALL your friends if you like. But don't let it consume you, stay proactive, CHANGE what is making you SO damn miserable. And surround yourself with love.
Well that's all I have to say about that for now, cause my little love is singing sweetly in his crib, and it's time for me to go pick him up, hug him, and know the beauty and sweetness life can be, if you let it.
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